Why Breakfast Is The Best

Some people drink a little too much and reminisce on past romances....I drink a little too much and whip out the photos of past meals I've loved.

What? You're on Instagram I'm sure, who do you think they created that for? Food porn lovers.

Out of all the meals I cook that I'm most likely to photograph, breakfast is the top contender for most pictured.

My breakfast creations, sadly, are not pretty. Which is why I'll share a few of my favourites now, while the wine is flowing and I'm feeling reminiscent.

Most often they resemble something that your cat barfed up after a night out on the town.

And with that image in your head....

My breakfasts are my favourite thing to cook out of anything. My favourite meal to eat at restaurants is usually going to be breakfast. If a restaurant claims to be all-day breakfast, it's usually my favourite restaurant. And the most looked at, most drooled over recipes in my cookbooks is always breakfast.

I think I've trained myself to love breakfast the most because, as an adult, it's the one meal that is most often cooked just for me and not for anyone else in mind. Because of how my Crohn's operates, breakfast literally is the most important meal of the day. My body has had a nice 6-8 hours of fasting during the night, something my Crohn's loves (intestinal rest period), and a lot of times, the first meal of the day will help determine how well I operate or how low energy I'll be for the rest of my day. So my breakfasts usually revolve around high protein, low sugar, low carb for the most part, and always, always easily digested veggies.

GF bread (it just tastes good to me), smashed avocado with lemon and salt, and nitrate-free bacon. Just trying to keep it hipster-friendly, obvi.

Current fav: avocado, lemon, salt and 'pancaked' eggs...not scrambled, pancaked.

I'm one of the crazy people that will lose sleep if it means getting up early enough to cook myself a big breakfast. No porridge or cantaloupe and cottage cheese for this girl. Take your diets and get out of my kitchen cause that is not how I play. Sure, if I'm trying to lose weight I'll eat soup for lunch and salad for dinner, but damnit there is a good chance that I'll be having three eggs and/or bacon for breakfast.

Bacon. The lover that loves you back. It handles you well......heh, heh....get it? Love handles....


Nevermind...

GF toast, scrambled eggs with smoked salmon, spinach, lemon, salt.

As much as I love cheesy pick up lines, don't ever ask me 'how do you like your eggs cooked in the morning?' cause I would most likely go off on a crazy person rant about how I'd be the one cooking the eggs cause I'm particular and you don't get to voice an opinion on how you want them cooked cause I'm gonna go make some shit up in the kitchen when I'm cooking them and you're gonna like it. DON'T PRESSURE ME.

Future post: Why Am I Single?

I don't know why I'm single, LOOK AT THE GOOD THINGS I COOK.... For myself....cause if I tried to cook this for anyone else, I'd burn the house down and somehow undercook the eggs.

I've always felt the Brits have breakfast down pretty good...or elevenses. I could always go for a sausage roll and a cuppa. The best in Southeast London are either at Heap's Sausages or, as pictured below, Hand Made Food in Blackheath.

A meal I miss from America.

You'll need:

to hang out in your pjs early on a Saturday morning

watching Doctor Who

eating Organic Peanut Butter Bumpers with Almond milk and a side of milky tea. 

It's all in the details.

As much as I love tea, thanks for that addiction England, I will always be a coffee addict at heart. It's literally my family's business. So these are just pictures of love. Enjoy!

Notes Coffee, London

TAP Coffee, Wardour Street, London

 And the creme de la creme....Monmouth Coffee, brewing in my V60 at home.

xx Lindsay

Introducing My Flat Wife

I don't think I'd be as happy as I am this second time living in London if it wasn't for me winning the flatmate lotto.

I found her when I was frantically searching for a room to rent about two weeks before I was set to move here. You'd think me waving my money around the Internet screaming 'here! TAKE MY MONEY!' would have made the process easier...but no. Also, I don't really have that much money...and nobody is really jumping on board when I advertise about my 'awesome homemade guacamole' and the fact that I'm a good cuddler. Big spoon or little spoon was never on the flatmate applications.

Spareroom was my website of choice on looking for people. Also, Facebook. My stage manager friend had a few leads for me, as did one or two other English friends. But ultimately, Spareroom and Skype came through for me. E was the only person who would Skype with me and even though we only chatted for a total of ten minutes, there for was giggles galore and repeated hair twirling on both parts. So ya know, love at first inappropriate joke. I'm sure there were many. I only really like people who make me laugh and who I can make laugh. I blogged about not really knowing how things were gonna go when I first arrived, you can check that out here.

Within a week or two we bonded quite happily. Seeing Punchdrunk together....being confused at Punchdrunk and heading for the bar at the exact same time...She bought me a glass of Champagne, so I had the lovin' feeling quite early on really. It doesn't take much to woo me.

EVERYONE takes a bathroom selfie at Punchdrunk's Drowned Man. Not kidding. Look on Instagram.

 There's been accidental 'oops where's all the wine gone?' kind of nights that turn into 'exciting dramatization using weird dolls' nights. Like ya do...

She was having an epic love affair with a Spanish wine and didn't want to tell her boyfriend, CabSav. He's a douche anyways.

 E has invited me to fun parties that involve looking sexy....

 ...and parties were you put on your Sunday best. Clearly.

Try to go out and pull with that face on. Some people go for the Zombie look though, it's like a thing now.

 And nothing quite says 'fancy pants' like pouring Strongbow in a Champagne glass and inventing the drink name 'Trampagne'.....because it's a 'tramp's version of Champagne.'

I adore her.  She's delightful and she laughs at me when I'm hungover and she gossips about big name bloggers with me and tells me stories about the time she had to dress Benedict Cumberbatch...and has not yet gotten mad at me when I stole her good bottle of Pino Grigio. So thanks for being a fabulous flatwife.

Happy wife, happy life.

xx Lindsay

Hardest Part of the Journey...is the Journey...?

I've totally got that wrong. But to surmise, things are haaaaard *insert whiny voice here*. (And yes, I used "surmise" correctly. I just googled it.)

I've had some wine so the actual decibel of my whine has gone down. Look at me, ma, I'm self soothing!

My friends have come to play.

Not self-medicating with wine in this photo...just felt it looked appropriate within the context of the narrative. "WINE!"...kinda how I feel about coffee too.

Things have gotten quite tricky on the grad school front. Which is....awesome. Cause this is just going to make me feel like actually being in grad school is a freaking breeze. Ahh, bless.

Funny thing about loans and visa's and grad school. It's all one big gigantic balancing act. Let me lay it down for ya from the beginning.

-Grad school accepted me, hooray! I'm moving back to my homeland...I mean where my heart is....home is where the heart is, so that kind of makes England my homeland..kind of. I don't know...something like that. But YAY!

-No grad school till I can make the first payment of $6,000. I am poor. Hahahaha. But okay. *Gulp wine. Fortify oneself*

-Apply for loan, loan company says "HELLYES, we'd like to help you along your path to debt. Let us give you money. We just need your school to tell us when."

-School accidentally puts down for the money to be released a month into school....basically making it impossible for me to put down my first payment before I start...which technically means, I ain't going.

-School fixes it right quick when I mention that I can't go if I don't get that loan. Ergo, they don't get awesome American dollars.

-Loan money comes in just a little over 1 week ago to the school.

-I need my CAS (confirmation of acceptance to study) paper from the school now that they have the loan money. I need that CAS paper to be able to apply for my visa. My visa that allows me to be in that country to study for a year.

-I am 10 days away from flying to London and I don't have my CAS. I don't have my visa. I don't have anywhere to live because the housing I found a week ago fell through due to unforeseen conditions.

-Additionally, I feel fat.

-And, I can't run due to plantar faciitis. This makes me want to punch people. Especially running bloggers because they're having so much fun...running...and blogging. Shut it, twinkle toes. Nobody wants to hear about your fabulous running adventures. (No wait, I do. I'm not serious. I love hearing about it. I want to weep in envy!)

I just really felt the need to add those last two on, just cause.

Where's my wine?

So yes, grad school...hard. Not even there yet. And it's getting a little rough having everyone keep asking me "are you so excited?" "Are you, like, totally freaking out?" "I mean, this is like your dream. How pumped are you?"

*Throws wine glass to the floor* (Actually that's just for dramatic effect, cause seriously.....I am poor and we don't waste that shit.)

NO. Currently I am not excited, thrilled, or peeing my pants with glee. I wish I was...all those things...except maybe not the pee. I feel slightly overwhelmed by the fact that I have so much to worry about. And I've officially stopped voicing those worries out loud (aren't you lucky to be reading this! Go on, feel pleased) because, as much as I love everyone who says this to me, if I hear one more person say "oh don't worry, it'll all work out" I will PUNCH you in your delicate bits. Stop poo-pooing my stress okay? I know it's going to work out, because I'm bloody well going to make it work out. At this point, there is no way possible that I will be deterred from going over to London for grad school. (*Knock on wood*)

But when people say this in a "hush now little one" *hypothetical pat on head* kind of way, makes my worry, my fears seem childish and insignificant.

And let me tell you, this chocolate and wine habit I am currently cultivating really demonstrates that my emotions are not insignificant. Either join me in drink, or commiserate and tell me your tale of woe. Otherwise...stfu. I say that politely, with non-aggression, and a slight curtsy.

*End Rant*

In good news...my dog has learned a new game. It's called "I'm Mad At You. Hide the Poo."

Essentially, what happened was...my sister and I went away to DC for a long weekend. We did not go to work on Thursday and Friday because of this long weekend road trip, and ergo, Charlie did not get to go to his favorite place ever--CarRideAndThenToWORK. Since we've taken him to the office every day with us (perk of working for our Dad, holler), and he gets treats constantly from all the delivery people, it's like Disney World for him. So we denied him Disney World for two days.

What he does, in retaliation, is poops in my upstairs living room (I live in a kind of in-law apartment attachment of the house. It keeps me and my parents from killing each other.) But he's not like a normal dog, oh no. He's Catholic Guilt Charlie. He does wrong, and feels HORRENDOUS about it. If he could whip himself, he would. So he eats the poop. Like ya do. He eats the poop cause it was his favorite thing to do as a puppy. He eats the poop out of guilt, but at the same time still does it out of retaliation, like a good Catholic. He likes to watch in glee as we run around the small space trying to figure out where the fuck he pooped.

"Poo? What poo? I no poo. If there no poo, there no problem."

So my living room space smells like poop. My Dad tried cleaning up the suspect spots...but we can't be sure. Cause the damn dog ate the evidence.

YAY. WINE.

I want to add on to this whole shenanigan piece that I have not been working out as much as usual, so that makes me a little bit crazy. Apologies. But you can only blame yourself if you've not been entertained by my narrative, cause you've gone on reading it this far. Well done you.

I've resorted to de-stressing through food. I'm telling you right now, watch out for Amanda over at Rhymes & Ribbons . I've been trying out a few of her recipes and they will wash your cares away in a nice creamy vodka sauce. Pasta alla Vodka and I have been making friends...a lot recently.

That eye is supposed to be bigger than the other. Allergies. Not wine. Seriously. 

Most amazing thing ever. I've had it twice in two weeks.

 I also made the best decision ever of trying her Nutella Stuffed Chocolate Chocolate Chip Cookies. Regular cookies will never be enough now.

Recipe has been placed on fridge for easy viewing. When you're feeling low, eat your carbs. God said that.

Better than booze in drowning ones sorrows. Oh and look! I now have more cushion....for sitting. Lovely.

Right. I'm off now to find my dignity somewhere. (Well if you read the last post, Getting Physical: Dominating the Swim Category you'll gather that I don't actually have any...it's there. I swear.)

Cheers, and next time, less complaining...but probably the same amount of wine....

Lindsay xx

Sunday Confessional

**NOTE: This was originally supposed to be posted on Sunday when I was in London. However, I do not know how technology works and therefore it did not go up then. So just pretend it's Sunday and let the humor wash over you like a gentle rain while you enjoy your hot coffee and pancakes. 

I feel like I need to have a weekly "Confessional" post. Purge myself of all the stupid stuff I've done that week and to make others just feel dandy and smart about all their decisions in life. Unless you're doing drugs. Even I'm not that stupid. Stop it.

Fun side fact: Raised Catholic and when to Catholic school until I was 10. Did not understand the point of confessional every month. I actually made shit up to confess because I couldn't come up with any good examples in my real life (probably the start of my self-involvement. In my world, I am a darling angel.) Some examples: "Ummm, I broke a vase." "I lied to my Mom about it." Repeat that every month. I wonder if the priest ever caught on or just thought I was a household deviant.

1. Past weekend. Went to a bachelorette party where, when I was not even drunk, I proceeded to chuck my iPhone into the hot tub. Nothing really tops the humor in hearing four girls screeching "where is it? I GOT IT, I GOT IT!" We're adults, and we know how to party.

2. Monday. Decided I would be going on a diet to lose ten pounds by end of June, just in time for one of my best friend's wedding where I will be attending dateless. Promptly opened a bottle of red wine. Probably doubled my calories for the day. Diet win.

3. Tuesday, no coffee, only two cups of tea. Attempted to lock front door of house by clicking my car key fob at it. Seriously.

4. Tuesday. Convo with sis: Her-"I really wish I lived back then." (In regards to the 1920s in Syracuse) Me-"I don't wish I lived then. But I do wish I was the doctor's companion and could travel back then for a little fun."  .........yup. Crickets.

5. Tuesday. Sis and I could not figure out if the spot on the carpet was dog pee. Stuck my nose in it. Definitely dog pee.

6. Wednesday. When I was driving around looking for food after my dentist appointment, I actually said out loud to myself "I need something to put in my mouth to counteract this cleanliness." I pulled over to have a good laugh. Couldn't figure out who to call to relay the dirty joke I told myself, so I'll just leave it here.

7. Wednesday Night. Found leftover package of Marshmallow Peckers from bachelorette party. Talked my little sister into making a s'more out of them. Couldn't stop making penis jokes in front of my parents. This is what happens when you live at home as an adult. Good, wholesome, family fun. I do believe I told my Mom that my marshmallow was a ten-second man.

Cheers,
Lindsay Xxx

Crazy Times

Life is such a crazy mix. I've had such a good time tonight, after opening night of the first play of my season at work. And I'm in a mood of appreciation. Appreciating the friends I have surrounding me, of the creative people I encounter in my work (check out Anthony Cochrane IMMEDIATELY....seriously in love with his music and composing style...and I am now proud owner of two CD's of music from plays he's worked on at my theatre) and just happy about a lot of things (can I just say....went to a GI doctor today and turns out I'm NOT lactose intolerant...just going through a rough digestive patch...someday I WILL eat cheese again :)...

......but at the same time, last week still sits on my shoulders and it's hard to be too comfortable. When I'm alone, I remember "hey, Ben died on Wednesday.....you know, he'd love this play..." and it just tears me up. I've never had anybody close to me die and I don't know how to think, feel or deal with it. But he comes up in my thoughts almost every day, and I've developed a new kind of perspective. One that has me less stressed at work and about certain relationships because, ya know, in the end....the little things don't matter. It's family, friends and the path you pursue that's important.

....And that's your deep, philosophical thought of the morning...you're welcome!

Cheers!

Happy Moments

Hey. Hey. Hey. Guess what?

TWO WEEKS till I'm off to London. Iamsoexcitedyouhavenoidea!

I'll have little-to-no money while there, but begging on London street corners just has a classy, 'woman of the world' feel to it, don't ya think? So much nicer than begging in DC. Which usually will result in getting yourself mixed up in a debate where neither party can fully back up what they're saying but both are holding on to the conversation like two starving dogs fighting for scrap meat.

I really have no idea where that just came from.

I'm in a ridiculously good mood tonight. Thursday night I got to see a play. It was Pay-What-You-Can-Preview night over at The Source Theater on 14th Street NW, where Constellation theatre was putting on On the Razzle. It was a great show that made me laugh and boy is that something I need in this economy. And I am so grateful for PWYC preview nights. It's really the only way I'll be able to see shows in the next few months, unless they're free or I'm working for them.

This upcoming Tuesday I might be seeing another PWYC preview for another show. Yeah!

I'm also in a good mood cause I've spent the night in with a glass of red wine (hi there Lindemans Pinot Noir....delish and cheap! I love the friend that suggested this too me...she knows me well) and I've been working on two monologue pieces that I would love to do for some grad school auditions...if I can can wrangle some up while I'm in London. (Tomorrow morning I'll be up early to crack away at the applications...oh joy.)

I have such a weird love of monologue work. Actually just working on a script when you're first introduced to it and trying to make it's acquaintance, is really quite a delight. You play parts over in your head getting a feel for it. It tumbles out your mouth, awkward at first as you learn it's taste and try out it's sound. Over and over. Words start making meaning upon meaning pile up. Pictures play behind your eyes, an achy need to move starts to bubble up, the lips are having all the fun and the body wants to follow through. You move it, shift it, try it one way, add some energy here, here and here. What do I want you to see? What do I understand about this part? Do you see what I'm saying? I'm not me, I'm me. Hello, welcome.

Aaaaaand theatre geek moment done. I'm starving. I think it's Cheerios time. Mmmm, cheerios. A cereal that goes with any wine really. Trust me on this, I'm an expert on wine/cereal pairings.

Hugs and Kisses.

Open Call

Dear Men:

HI! My name is Lindsay and I. AM. SINGLE. It's official. I am open to dating, so let's get it on. Okay, GO! I am ready for the flirting to commence. I have my stick ready to beat off the masses swarming around me for attention--I promise to be gentle.....

....okay....any time now.....feel free to ask me out....

...ummm, I'm waiting, did I not say GO?!

Seriously now. Do I honestly need to give you an incentive for this already hot package?

.........................................................

Damn. Okay....here ya go.

I am available-Single & ready to mingle.

How can you say no to footie pajamas?

Wait.....don't let this awkward silence come between us.

Ah well, at least my feet are warm and I am beyond awesome.

Nuf' said.

Love, Future Nun Candidate.

What I do on a day off.

I'm starting to see a trend in my life, with all of it's busyness and stress, I've started in on some habits of leisure during my brief moments of respite:

Last Tuesday night, off from work...

(Ladies Cigar night, what what. We rock...and so does Romeo y Julieta)

Tonight, off from work.....

Though, let it be seen....I was attempting to do a budget tonight and that, of course, requires red wine to fend off the sobbing jags and depressing thoughts (cause seriously, yo? who can be depressed with red wine?). The 'Playing Shakespeare' DVD's were just my reward. Granted, they were rewarded a bit early because I never really finished that stupid budget. I spilled red wine and then needed to drink more red wine to make myself feel better....VICIOUS CYCLE.

Mmmmkay....now it's back to 'Playing Shakespeare'. These DVDs were lent to me from an actress friend, currently in the play I am House Managing for, and I'm in love with them already. The amazingness of them has caused me to burst into my Shakespeare monologues at random times....wait....that may just be due to red wine consumption.

Okay. That is all.

The end.

Dirty

Things I have said, or things that I have overheard, as a house manager at a theatre(I may have to re-do this post several times, just to add new things to it..us FOH peeps need to keep ourselves entertained with the inappropriate):

Co-Worker: Why do you put the cards in the seats that way?

Me: Because it's thicker that way, it's harder to pull out and stays in longer.

Box office to me: The best things come out of your cleavage.

Actor: He was letting everyone know he only wears underwear as a courtesy for the costume...normally it's commando all the time.

Another HM: "You need to bring the conversation down to zero." (This was just funny because it was said to a patron...hours after the house managers and the box office was having a conversation about Captain Planet and the phrase "bringing pollution down to zero".)

Another HM: In reference to picking which duties we would take care of that night--"Lindsay, do you need to pee tonight?"

Box office: "I prefer not to speak to people I don't know sober."

Stalk Me...I Like The Attention

I just want to point out that I tweet my exact location and the time I will be there on my twitter account to the right.

So...ya know...if you're a stalker looking for a willing victim, I am SO your girl. It's okay....I like the attention. I am an actress at heart after all.....

Culinary Genius

I just want to take a moment and brag about my impressive culinary skills.

I was able to recreate a recipe that a fellow theatre friend gave me (thanks Raven!) without using a written recipe. Be prepared to be impressed. Recipe is as follows: Buy Pillsbury Crescent Rolls in tube (I bought the one that makes only four...thank God.), make Pillsbury Crescent Rolls according to instructions (so what if it took me ten minutes to figure out how to get the damn things out, despite having a pull tab...then taking another ten minutes to figure out to unroll them. Baby steps people, baby steps...I never said I was a culinary genius...or did I?), before rolling rolls add chocolate chips to center, then roll around chocolate chips. Cook and voila! You have delicious, amazing, fattening, but super cheap chocolate croissants. It's practically ghetto fabulous and when you're a poor actor...then you be all about the cheapness. Pair with coffee. Equals a fabulous (if slightly unhealthy) start to your morning.

I only bought the four pack...then ate all four. Could have powered through a few more. Definitely won't be buying anything bigger than four....unless I have guests that need to be impressed with my culinary genius (well, Raven's culinary genius) ;)