You know, I leave this blog for just a little while, a short time my head is turned, and when I get back everything has freaking changed on me.
Grrr...I'm not good with change....
...Says the girl who's about to go through major life upheaval...yet again. It's like I get bored after a few years and need to shake things up. Even if that means that I am taking a risk and it might not play out well for me.
Just a smattering of details for you, non-existent readers...I shall nickname you Fred. Makes me feel like I have an invisible friend again. Well, not again, but for the first time. All my invisible friends as a child were real....like a tree....or a bird. Sometimes the local pond was a good buddy too.
What can I say, I was a bit of a weird child. Who needs invisible friends when you can talk to nature, like a crazy person.
So Fred, yes, well...the past year (okay, maybe the past two years) have been a crazy time for me. I was doing well, am doing well, in our great country's capital. I have a super-duper love for the friends I have made here. They have really made my time here fantastic/amazeballs...even though I have never quite warmed up to the actual city.
But for some reason, my health has just taken a nose dive ever since I went full time at my theatre job. You'd think moving from a chaotic schedule of four hours of sleep a night, working many jobs, one of which was waitressing, and living off the most horrendous diet of coffee and ANYTHING SUGAR, to sitting on my ass, doing lots of office work (and still working crazy hours, mind you, Fred) would be a good change. Especially with having those wonderful things called "health benefits". And yes I was able to get a gastroenterologist (almost a year after having the job, sadly) to help me with my health. I went through that weird time period last year where I thought I was lactose intolerant but it just turns out I could digest nothing. Dairy being the hardest thing to digest, that was the first to go.
So I got on some lovely drugs and now I can tolerate some dairy. Some dairy. I don't have the crazy bloat, partial bowel obstruction, problems I used to struggle with last year, but I still have problems every single week that I'm struggling with.
On a super positive note, this decline in health has been a really great wake up call for me. I've searched out some awesome blogs online written by other people who have Crohn's and I can't begin to express how helpful that has been. I don't reach out to them, just peruse their sites and read their tales of struggles and battles won. It really does give me a lot of hope. If they can do it, so can I. And I'm not even that bad off, really, in comparison.
This disease has made me appreciate the greatness of my family and my friends that I surround myself with and, as a really fun side effect, has made me a hot crying mess over every goddamn thing. Get excited.
Come on, you can't tell me that you don't just love having a weepy, non-drunk, friend hug you and say "no, but I really love you man!" And, oh, am I a hugger. I give 'em out like candy. And you're gonna like it.
But to wrap all this up...change. It's gonna happen. To this blog, to my body, to my life. It's gonna be AWESOME. I am sure of it.
Today's a sick day for me, so I am on a super, mega-amazing positivity kick...can you tell? Had a mini-flare up last night after eating a few Hobnobs.....really?! Hobnobs? The most delicious, oaty, chocolatey British biscuit every (outside of Digestives, which I just couldn't find at the time my chocolate craving hit). Ridiculous. I know that my intestines can't be completely done with hobnobs. That's just not fair to life. But I wasn't reading the signs right...my body and I speak different languages so it's hard to tell what she's trying to tell me sometimes. Like yesterday she must have, at some point, been saying "bitch, there will be no processed shit today. We are closed for business to processed deliciousness that you love."
I had a really creative, light, protein filled breakfast of arugula, spinach, caramelized red onion with bacon pieces that I had left over, and threw a poached egg on top. Let me tell you, it was baller.
But, per usual, I was hungry by the time I got to work. I tried to be all healthy and just snack on cucumbers and peppers but, no surprise, that did not satisfy. So I had one Hobnob...then two....and maybe a third. And felt fine....kind of. I ate a very lovely lunch of baked chicken, grape tomatoes, garlic, lemon juice, olive oil, on penne pasta. Went down fine. Wanted dessert.
Cause who doesn't?
Had maybe three more Hobnobs......that's when my stomach said, enough is enough and shut me down. That usually means she'll start to groan and gurgle and I'll start to feel the oncoming bloat. It didn't really get too bad until later in the evening. But after laying down for awhile and sweating under the miracle that is a heating pad, I felt a bit better. Still called in today as now I've moved into what I call my "recovery period". I need to be able to eat, or not eat, exactly when I want to. I need to be very comfortable, preferably laying down, and not stressing. So there's been a lot of HGTV this morning and a little Pinning on the side (oh, yes, I signed up for Pinterest yesterday and it. is. CRACK....ohhhh look at all the lovely photos. I'm still all about reading the blogs, but this is like candy. Quick and fun.)
But also planning. I swear I've done some planning today...got it all locked up in the old noggin. Swear I'll get acting on this stuff soon. I hope to be able to go into more details at some point soon. And oh the blogging that I shall be doing. I am PUMPED. I've also been sitting on my ass all morning so it's pretty easy to be pumped.